Last of the Great Auks Miso Soup, Red Curry, and Salad

The Great Auk was a beautiful, penguin-like flightless bird. You can look at a wonderful illustration by John James Audubon here. (And then you should look up Walton Ford.) So why haven't you ever seen a real life auk? I quote Wikipedia:

The last colony of Great Auks lived on Geirfuglasker (the "Great Auk Rock") off Iceland. This islet was a volcanic rock surrounded by cliffs which made it inaccessible to humans, but in 1830 the islet submerged after a volcanic eruption, and the birds moved to the nearby island of Eldey, which was accessible from a single side. When the colony was initially discovered in 1835, nearly fifty birds were present. Museums, desiring the skins of the auk for preservation and display, quickly began collecting birds from the colony. The last pair, found incubating an egg, was killed there on 3 July 1844, with Jón Brandsson and Sigurður Ísleifsson strangling the adults and Ketill Ketilsson smashing the egg with his boot.

Oy. Vey. Strangulation less likely to damage the skins? More likely to damage the psyche. Extinction: first as tragedy, then again as tragedy. (Or is the farcical return the Apocalypse?) "The last pair, found incubating an egg..." puts meteors in my dreams. Worth considering is whether the modern policy of preserving species in captivity is substantively different than preserving a species in taxidermy. Considered worth a No.

I'm in Beautiful British Columbia now. Yesterday made food for girlfriend's family. A warming night in a place cooler than I'm used to this time of year. Gf made miso soup in the afternoon.

Fermented soy, tofu, mushrooms, green onion, spinach. Yumsies. She also made salad: lettuce and parsley with lemon vinegar dressing.

And now the curry recipe. Next time we'll use more cayenne, more basil, and more red pepper. And not slice the basil leaves.

makes approx. 7 servings

INGREDIENTS:

2 1/2 c. basmati rice

1 lb. tofu

1/2 head of cauliflower, chopped

1 red bell pepper, sliced

2 handfuls little potatoes, cubed

1 red onion, diced

4 cloves garlic, minced

2 cans light coconut milk
1 handful Thai basil, sliced

4 spoonfuls curry paste

curry powder

cayenne

ground sea salt

ground black pepper

DIRECTIONS:

1. Cook the rice according to package directions.

2. In a large pot, sauté onion in oil over medium-high heat. Stir occasionally, add garlic after several minutes. Add red pepper and tofu.
3. Boil the potatoes in water. Don't cook them too long, but as soon as they're tender transfer them with a slotted spoon to the pot. Boil the cauliflower for a few minutes.
4. Add the cauliflower to the pot, then pour in the coconut milk. Add the curry paste, basil, and seasonings. Lower the heat and reduce until desired consistency.

One more thing. A few days ago we went to Palace Playland in Old Orchard Beach, ME. I've been terrified of amusement park rides my whole life, ever since I went on Rocky Mountain Railroad at Disneyland as a young child and felt like I was going to die. My uncle convinced me to go on a proper roller coaster several years later, but it must have been equally traumatizing because I've repressed all memory of it between the initial ascent and stepping off onto firm ground. But my girlfriend's giddiness got me so excited I steeled myself and rode both the Galaxi and the Power Surge. And I loved it! I've never felt so relaxed and fuzzy as I did after being spun through the air with my feet dangling.

Boozy Clergy Crispy Tofu with Mashed Potatoes and Broccoli

[First off, props to my friend Andrew for advising the use of Cooling Filter 82 (5-15%) in Photoshop. Thank god someone knows what he's doing.]

This post is a synthesis of the previous two. Unifying the alcoholic and religious components, we overcome yet another facet of clerical asceticism. On June 14, 1789, Rev. Elijah Craig, "a pioneering Baptist preacher" (says Wikipedia, as always) born in Virginia (just like your faithful blogger — holla!)... hold on. Wikipedia claims there's a precise date for Rev. Craig's innovation of aging corn distillate in charred oak casks. Well, whatever, you've got him to thank for modern corn whiskey. Rev. Craig was arrested at least once for preaching without a license. That's my kind of preacher! From his eulogy in The Kentucky Gazette: "His preaching was of the most solemn style; his appearance as of a man who had just come from the dead..." Again, my kind of preacher!

Tonight's meal is courtesy of Vegan Dad and Isa Chandra Moskowitz. Golden Crispy Tofu! Savory Mushroom Gravy! Mashed potatoes (6 Yukon golds boiled with a few cloves of garlic, mashed with some vegan butter and salt and pepper)! Steamed broccoli! Probably more trouble than it's worth!

Tiny Mix Tapes published the latest installment of my comic, A Thousand K.s.

April Fools' Day Meal

April Fools' Day is obnoxious. There's no joke here.

Tonight's meal didn't know what it wanted to be. I had tofu, potatoes, kale, and mushrooms. I was going to make scrambled tofu with a red jalapeño and maybe some quinoa, then I was going to use soy sauce and maybe make some rice. What I settled on was balsamic vinegar, red wine vinegar, sherry, sage, oregano, and parsley. Sort of weird with tofu (and a jalapeño), but I liked it. I baked the kale until crispy.

I'm not posting a recipe because it's straightforward and I've done it many times before. Maybe it's a function of the season (root vegetables ad nauseum), but I've been making the same half-dozen or so meals on rotation. Which doesn't make for interesting reading, I'm sure. Hence the following announcement:

Indefinite hiatus due to lack of inspiration.

Exxon Valdez Stir Fry

I'd been in the world less than a year when the Exxon Valdez ran aground in Prince William Sound and spilled 240,000 barrels of petroleum. Boy am I sure glad nothing like that's happened since! I'd post another link to the article I wrote about the justice of eco-terrorism, but maybe it's enough just to mention that I wrote about the justice of eco-terrorism.

Vegansaurus tells me that some women are using fur as hair extensions. That's the kind of choice that'll inspire me to vomit on someone.

This meal did the opposite of make me want to vomit. It's a bit weird because I had to use all the fresh food I had lying around before I leave town for the week. Virginia is for lovers. Or for hanging out with one's parents.

makes approx. 3-4 servings

INGREDIENTS:

1 c. long grain brown rice

1 yellow onion, diced

1 lb. tofu, cubed

1 crown broccoli, chopped

1 c. baby arugula, tightly packed

1/2 clove garlic, minced

1/2 hot house tomato, sliced

1 avocado, chopped

1/4 c. nutritional yeast

sesame oil

shoyu soy sauce

cayenne

ground Tellicherry pepper

red pepper flakes

curry powder

DIRECTIONS:

1. Cook the rice.

2. Sauté onion in a large pan with oil. Add tofu. Once the bottoms start to brown, toss in broccoli.

3. Once you've minced the garlic, throw that in and douse it all with soy sauce and pack the arugula in on top. Let it get cooking for a while.

4. After the broccoli has acquired a bright sheen, add in the tomato, avocado, seasonings, and yeast flakes. Pour in more soy sauce if needed. Mix it all up and cook until the nutritional yeast starts to stick to the bottom of the pan. Cut the heat.

Biggie Smalls Bruschetta and Stir Fry

The Notorious B.I.G. was murdered 14 years ago. We all know the story, so I'll just leave ya with a track. So many classics to pick from, but right now I'm partial to "Juicy". Bringing you back.

The bruschetta's just some slices of bread drizzled with olive oil and topped with leftover sauce from the spaghetti I made a couple nights ago. 18 min. in the oven at 375F.

makes approx. 3-4 servings

INGREDIENTS:

1 c. long grain brown rice

5 shallots, diced

1 fat clove garlic, sliced

1 lb. tofu, cut into little rectangles

1 1/2 broccoli crowns, chopped

1 hot house tomato, sliced

1/8 c. walnuts, chopped

shoyu soy sauce

1 tsp. cumin

1 tsp. coriander

1 tsp. black sesame seeds

1 tsp. white sesame seeds

1/2 tsp. turmeric

1/4 tsp. cayenne, 90k Scoville

1/4 tsp. salt

sesame oil

DIRECTIONS:

1. Simmer the rice 45 min.

2. Sauté the shallots in a large pan in sesame oil. After they start to brown, add the garlic for a couple minutes, then toss in the tofu and broccoli. Douse in soy sauce, cover for a while.

3. Once the broccoli starts to turn bright green, uncover and add in walnuts, tomato, and seasonings. Heat through, try to get the broccoli a little crispy on the edges.

Here's my review of Mike Leigh's most recent film, Another Year.

Svetlana Alliluyeva Stir Fry

Stalin's daughter, Svetlana Alliluyeva, defected to the US 44 years ago. I guess she's living in Wisconsin now. Weird.

There wasn't any special method to this one, so I'm just gonna tell you what's in it. Tofu, edamame, corn, Red Chieftain potatoes, crimini mushrooms, shallots, garlic, soy sauce, turmeric, cumin, paprika. Use hot sauce too!

I made some cookies for a little get-together Saturday night. My brown sugar is a solid block for some reason, so I used all white sugar. Funny how they turned out like sugar cookies with chocolate chips tossed in, rather than proper chocolate chip cookies.

Not sure if I ever posted a link to the second installment of my comic, so here it is.

Also, watch these horrible yuppie foodies rationalize eating a live lobster. They eat an animal while it's alive. They ain't comfortable, but they do it.

Douglas Hofstadter Beet Soup

Douglas Hofstadter turned 66 today! Gödel, Escher, Bach is a great book, but so is the much more concise, political, freely accessible "A Person Paper on Purity in Language." Check it out.

There's maybe a little too much going on in this soup, but at least it's hearty and flavorful. And there's lots of it. My first time cooking with beets. Beets are delicious. For the broth I used 3 c. water I'd frozen after cooking black beans, plus 2 c. water from making kidney beans on Saturday.

makes approx. 5-8 servings (I really have no idea)

INGREDIENTS:
1 c. green lentils
2/3 c. quinoa
5 small sweet potatoes, cubed
1 beet, skinned and cubed
1 medium white onion, diced
~1/2 c. tofu, crumbled
1/4 c. cilantro
1/2 tsp. cumin
1/2 tsp. fenugreek seeds
1/2 tsp. chili powder
5 c. vegetable broth
3 c. water

DIRECTIONS:
1. Fill a large stock pot with broth and lentils. Bring to a boil, then lower to a simmer. Add the sweet potatoes and the beet.
2. After 25 min., toss in the onion, tofu, cilantro, and spices. Start simmering the quinoa in a separate pot.
3. After another 20 min., turn off the heat. Stir in the quinoa and the water, which will instantly bring down the temperature to a comfortable hotness. Serve immediately!

I can't figure out how to embed audio, so if you want to listen to this funny little piece I recorded March 10, 2006 on a warped half-size acoustic guitar and contact mic, you'll have to download it here.

Vera Zasulich Tofu Scramble Fried Noodles

Maybe I should work on my presentation. Poor arrangement, good flavor. I didn't go to the grocery store today because I worked 7:30am-4pm and it was below 10F. Not good traveling weather. So there's no onion in this dish, although you should use some if you've got it! Also, I intended to use coriander rather than cardamom but I mislabeled my baggies and wasn't paying attention. Turns out cardamom and yeast flakes complement each other.

This one's named after the 133rd anniversary of Vera Zasulich's shooting of then-Governor of St. Petersburg, Fyodor Trepov. I just read about this in Kropotkin's memoirs! Zasulich won the trial and moved to Switzerland a popular hero. Someone else who's a hero is Isa, whose tofu scramble recipe inspired my method.

makes approx. 3 servings

INGREDIENTS:

1 lb. tofu

1 large stalk broccoli, diced, with florets

1 handful shiitake mushrooms, sliced

3 cloves garlic, minced

shoyu soy sauce

1/3 package rice bran Pad Thai fettuccine

1 tsp. cardamom

1 tsp. oregano

1/2 tsp. turmeric

1/2 tsp. red pepper flakes

1/4 tsp. salt

ground black pepper

1/4 c. yeast flakes

2 Tbsp. sesame oil

DIRECTIONS:

1. Cook the noodles according to package directions.

2. Fry broccoli in a pan with some oil over medium-high heat. Mince garlic, then toss it in with broccoli. After a minute, crumble tofu. Slice mushrooms and add to pan. Splash some soy sauce on top. If using a metal pan, scrape the bottom with a spatula.

3. Mix the seasoning in a small container with a little bit of water. Once the noodles are done, add all remaining ingredients and cook over medium until things are warm and sticky.

From Hyun Höchsmann's and Yang Guorong's introduction to the Zhuangzi:

"The cook works with his spirit and not with his eyes. Following the natural forms, he lets the knife slide through the large crevices and follows the big cavities. After nineteen years the edge of his knife is as sharp as if it had just come from the whetstone."

Bonanza Curry Soup

I came up with this recipe while on the bus back from NYC. It was a Bonanza bus, hence the name. My memory of what was in my kitchen was accurate except that there turned out not to be a can of corn. Oh well.

I might suggest using a little less curry powder than I did, but I'm keeping the recipe as is to reflect what I actually ate for dinner. Discretion is always advised when taking my culinary advice.

makes approx. 3-4 servings

INGREDIENTS:
1/2 acorn squash
1/2 c. cashews
1 medium yellow onion, diced
3 cloves garlic, chopped
1 lb. tofu, cubed
1 1/2 c. edamame, shelled
1 c. broth
2 c. water
2 tsp. curry powder
1 tsp. fenugreek seeds
1/2 tsp. chile powder
1/2 tsp. cayenne powder
1/2 tsp. salt
5 sun-dried tomatoes, julienned (sort of)
oil
Earth Balance


DIRECTIONS:
1. Preheat oven to 425F. Fill the center of half an acorn squash with cashews. Bake for 10 minutes.
2. Heat a pad of Earth Balance margarine with some canola oil in a large soup pot over medium heat. Cook the onion until translucent, then add the garlic and tofu. Let the tofu brown on the bottom, then scrape with a spatula.
3. Remove the squash from the oven. Empty the cashews into a blender. Cut off the rind of the squash and slice into chunks. Place in the blender along with broth and water. Puree until relatively smooth.
4. Add the edamame to the soup pot and cook for a few minutes. Pour the pureed cashews and squash into the pot, bring to a boil and reduce to a simmer.
5. Add the seasoning and let the soup cook for 5-10 minutes. Garnish with sun-dried tomatoes.


"I don't think of love as — in this context — as emotion bosh. I don't think of it as a weak force, but I think of love as something strong, and that organizes itself into powerful direct action."
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Fried Tofu and Potatoes

I made this dinner last Wednesday. It's tofu and potatoes fried with onion, grape tomatoes, a poblano pepper, and an avocado. I got to try out a citrus zester my parents gave me for Christmas. Worked like a charm.

Curious fact: While doing some research on Wikipedia to attempt to determine what sort of potato I'd bought from the farmers market (I think they were Bamberg!), I learned that potatoes produce toxic compounds called glycoalkaloids, which can kill you! Guess that doesn't happen too often.
makes 3-4 servings

INGREDIENTS:
1 lb. firm tofu, cubed
4-5 small (Bamberg) potatoes, cubed
1 medium yellow onion, diced
3 handfuls grape tomatoes, halved
1 poblano pepper, diced
1 avocado, chopped
(the seasoning is pretty much stolen from Isa, without whose recipes I would be helpless)
2 tsp. cumin
1 tsp. turmeric
1 tsp. thyme
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. lime zest
1/4 c. yeast flakes

DIRECTIONS:
1. Boil potatoes until tender, but not to the point of mushiness.
1. Peel and dice the onion. Coat the bottom of a metal pan in canola oil and place over medium-high heat. Add onion.
2. Do as much chopping and dicing as possible until the onion is translucent. Add tofu. If the potatoes are ready, drain them, chop, and add to the pan.
3. Let the tofu fry until the bottoms get crispy. Work them with the spatula, then add the poblano. Fry for something like 5 minutes.
4. Add the spices and herb with enough water to just coat the bottom of the pan. Fry for another several minutes, occasionally scraping with the spatula to make sure nothing gets fused to the pan. Add more oil if needed.
5. Add the tomatoes and avocado. After a minute, add the nutritional yeast and shuffle well. Cook for a few minutes.

(Recommended:) Serve with hot sauce.

One of my favorite vegan/food blogs, Vegansaurus, posted the above picture. Sounds like Meave was uncomfortable with as well as amused by my message. I was only offering my hospitality, honest!